insult to injury

so, i lost my job on friday.

i can’t say that it was totally unexpected (a job is only willing to put up with issues and illnesses so long, it seems), but it still stings and the fact that it happened right before christmas is just salt on the wound that has been this entire year.

i also admit that i’ve been pretty mopey and angry about the whole thing.

how dare they fire me?

but no one is irreplaceable, are they? especially in the work force. there’s always someone who’s willing to take up the space you filled for less and that’s what corporations want, right?

even in my situation, my desk was emptied and filled the very next day (i heard this from a friend who works in the very same department), and even that wasn’t shocking.

it still hurt, though.

i gave four years of my life to that job, and while it soured toward the end for various reasons (personal and health related alike), i did enjoy what i did.

but, dwelling on what could have (or should have) happened isn’t going to do anyone any good and as of today, i’ve spent a week doing the thing i told myself i wouldn’t do.

so, i’m not going to anymore.

i got fired.

it happens.

it sucks, and it’s a definite blow to my pride and ego, but i can look at this as a positive instead of a negative.

  1. i’m no longer working a job that i’m bored with for people that don’t want me around.
  2. i have the opportunity to explore new adventures
  3. i have time to focus on my studio and other projects i’ve put on the back burner

ultimately, i’ll be alright.

things are tough, but i’ve made it through my entire life by just tucking my head down and plowing forward.

this really isn’t all that different.

sure, money’s tight and i’m not quite sure where i’m going to scramble my next rent payment from, but i have to trust in the universe, right?

for months, everything’s been telling me that change is coming, that adventures await, that new beginnings are to be had.

i didn’t think it would be this extreme or jarring, but who am i to judge?

i just have to listen.

xx

on labeling oneself

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like every new practitioner, i once found myself inundated with so much information i didn’t know what to do with it all.

where do i start? what do i need to know? how will i know this is the right path?

stop. breathe.

it’s going to be okay.

i’m going to let you in on a secret:

you don’t need a label.

wild, i know, but bear with me.

i myself have gone through many different phases along many different paths and let me tell you, none of the labels i gave myself ever stuck for long.

why? because i was and still am evolving into my true self.

and maybe “witch” doesn’t even apply to you.

that’s perfectly okay. there’s no rule book when it comes to your personal journey, except the one you write for yourself.

embrace it.

embrace the uncertainty and be willing to push those boundaries. that’s where you learn the most and obtain what it is you truly, truly need.

maybe even that something that you didn’t even know you needed in the first place.

that’s all part of the fun anyway.

enjoy it and let the ebb and flow of it guide you.

by opening yourself up to the chaos of taking everything in, you open up your mind to endless possibility and achieving of things you never dreamed yourself capable of doing.

live. be free. grow.

there may be time for labels as you learn your craft, whatever that craft might be, but in my experience, limiting oneself is detrimental and damaging to the creative and discovery process.

as a young practitioner, i ran into the struggle of labeling myself a kitchen witch.

not only was this not true (i am not, nor will i ever be a “kitchen witch”), but i also found myself not studying things i was interested in because it went against what I thought my lot in life was, simply because it “wasn’t what kitchen witches did”.

sure, i could have went against the grain and did my own thing, but in my case, I had to completely do away with the labels and constraints I’d given myself and start fresh.

i could have saved myself so much stress and drama.

in the end, save the labeling for an established practice and allow yourself absolute freedom to explore and change.

you may find it’s just the sort of spontaneity you need.

xx

is “hobbitting” a thing?

if not, it should be.

i went on an adventure yesterday.

mostly unplanned, but still, enjoyable, it was one of the first really nice days of spring and when a friend (@asolitaryfeast) wanted to go to lunch, i couldn’t resist heading downtown for a stroll.

i love the atmosphere of downtown, what with all the hustle and bustle and fun to be found where you least expect it (we found a coffee shop tucked back in an alley one time. would never have known it was there if we hadn’t wandered that way on a whim).

we stopped at a second hand/antique store where i found about a dozen empty bottles for .50 a piece and i had to take them home. i don’t know what i’ll do with them, but what with the holistic shop i’m planning on opening very soon (watch this space!), i’m sure i’ll think of something.

anyway, we went to lunch at a lovely sushi restaurant and had poke bowls (poh-k? Poh-kay? we aren’t really sure, but if any of you know, please drop a comment.)

while not a fan of sushi all that much, i did enjoy the shrimp in my poke bowl, with its rice, ginger sauce and other toppings.

after that, we ducked in and out of a few local shops to peruse the new spring  “must haves” and other things.

we also stopped for what turned out to be the best chocolate chip peanut butter cookie i’ve ever had in my life. i half wish i was joking, but i’m not.

all in all, it was a fun day, full of good food and good company, and i hope to do it again soon.

xx